By Ava LawsonDivorce attorney

Photo of divorce petitionIn New Jersey, which allows no-fault divorce proceedings, many couples cite irreconcilable differences as justification for their split. As the term implies, irreconcilable differences is an inability for two married people to resolve disagreements or differing opinions, leading to a hostile and unhappy relationship. In such situations, where marriages are broken beyond any hope of repair, couples may agree that staying together is not in their, or their children’s, best interests.

What Is a “No-fault Divorce”?

No-fault divorces are those in which blame is not allocated to any one single party. Neither person has committed egregious acts such as adultery or extreme cruelty that purposefully undermined the marriage. Abandonment, domestic violence and other types of bad behavior are grounds for seeking an “at-fault” divorce.

In 2010, New York became one of the last states in the nation to recognize no-fault divorces, by amending legislation to add “irretrievable breakdown of the marriage” as grounds to terminate a marriage.

While the phrasing is different in NY, irretrievable breakdown of marriage is equivalent in meaning to irreconcilable differences as grounds for a no-fault divorce.

For some partners, this breakdown may entail ongoing disagreements about finances, personal trust issues, or the best way to discipline the children.

Others may argue constantly over the most mundane details, driving a permanent wedge in their relationship. Whatever types of disagreements and conflicts are experienced between spouses, they must – under New York law – last at least 6 months before the marriage is considered irretrievably broken in the eyes of the court.

Examples of Irreconcilable Differences

Citing irreconcilable differences or irretrievable breakdown of marriage as grounds for divorce is an effective way of avoiding a long and potentially fractious proceeding. When personality conflicts, constant bickering and growing resentment chip away at the health and stability of a marriage, couples may decide they can no longer stay together. This justification has become increasingly common, with more than 50 percent all divorce cases claiming irreconcilable differences.

Examples of irreconcilable differences include:

  1. Disagreements on finances and debt problems
  2. Loss of trust in the relationship
  3. Work that causes protracted long-distance separation
  4. Lack of sexual intimacy
  5. Personality conflicts
  6. Communication difficulties
  7. Failure to help in the household
  8. Differing political opinions
  9. In-law and familial involvement
  10. Growing apart due to different life goals and interests

Divorce Attorneys in New York & New Jersey

Kantrowitz, Goldhamer & Graifman is a full-service firm specializing in family law and matrimonial law. If you are considering filing a no-fault divorce in New Jersey or New York, it’s important to consult with an experienced attorney who can outline the process and safeguard your best interests. To set up a consultation with one of our divorce lawyers in Bergen County or Rockland County, please call our toll-free line at (888) 311-4803.

Additional Resources on Irreconcilable Differences:

  1. Cornell Law, irreconcilable differences https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/irreconcilable_differences
  2. NY Courts, Divorce https://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/family/divorce.shtml
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