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Does Your Child Not Want to Visit With Your Ex?

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Kantrowitz, Goldhamer, Graifman, Perlmutter & Carballo, P.C.

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Written/Reviewed By:

Barry S. Kantrowitz, Esq.

Last Updated: Apr 10, 2026

Read Time: 3 mins

There is no doubt that divorce can be stressful for all parties involved, most notably for children.

With this in mind, it is important for you to talk to your children about visitation if you have gone through a divorce or you are thinking about one. It is not unusual, especially among teens, for a child to pick a “favorite parent” or one that they would like to visit with more than another.

Unless there are circumstances involving domestic violence, abuse or conflicts in safety, when favoritism occurs, you should try to avoid conflict with your child and/or former partner. Talk to your child and encourage him or her to attempt to open up to a relationship with the other parent. Remind the child that the other parent loves and cares for him or her.

If talking to your child does not alleviate issues, you should stand firm and remind him or her that he or she must spend time with the other parent. Keep in mind, this is a legal issue—alienating another parent could result in a change in the custody agreement and/or more time in court.

Remember, if a parent fails to live up to a child custody or visitation agreement and attempts to deprive the other parent of parenting time, the other parent could seek a contempt or enforcement order from a court. However, unless you have joint custody arrangement where there is more or less an equal sharing of time with the children and support is directly connected to custodial and parenting time, you cannot hold an ex-spouse in contempt for failing to exercise parenting time. Visitation is a right, not an obligation.

How Do I Modify or Seek a Change in Child Custody?

Following a divorce, compromise becomes a big part of parenting. Child custody remains one of the most emotional and complicated issues in family law, as both parents often have the best intentions when it comes to their children.

Fighting and conflict can result in turmoil when it comes to custody or visitation schedules. You should work with an attorney who can moderate a mutually beneficial arrangement between yourself and your ex, with your child’s best interests in mind.

Remember, you can always seek a post-divorce modification of child custody and visitation schedules if necessary. Changes in obligations at work or in your personal life could result in moves or scheduling problems with your current visitation agreement.

If you are thinking about a divorce or you want to seek a modification to a custody or visitation schedule, call us today.

Kantrowitz, Goldhamer, Graifman, Perlmutter & Carballo, P.C. – Rockland County Divorce Attorneys

KGG’s Corner: Parents who encourage visitation with their ex are often doing so in the best interest of their child.

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Client Reviews

    
 
 
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   LWelsh 
 13 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Clever and efficient.
  
 
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   Kenny Perlow 
 34 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. KGG Law, and Barry Kantrowitz in particular, set the bar high for what a thorough, practical, strategic, compassionate and smart lawyer can be. Everything about Barry's advice and representation was exemplary and the stress mitigation that resulted was invaluable. On top of that, the ultimate result Barry achieved was beyond what was reasonable to expect and we are forever grateful. Often, people say that you hire a lawyer to prevent a problem. Sometimes, unfortunately, you need an attorney to solve a problem and I could not recommend Barry and his firm any more highly in that regard.
  
 
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   Aliza Ali 
 98 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. My dad had a great experience with this law firm. From the very beginning, the team was professional, knowledgeable, and always willing to answer our questions. They kept us informed throughout the entire process and made what could have been a very stressful situation much easier to handle. We truly appreciated their dedication, honesty, and hard work. Thanks to their support, my dad felt confident every step of the way. We are very grateful for everything they did and would highly recommend this firm to anyone looking for reliable legal representation.
  
 
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   Jana Montero 
 101 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I had a wonderful experience working with Sam Smith. He was very responsive, thorough, and easy to work with from start to finish. He walked me through everything clearly and made what started as a very stressful situation for me into something completely manageable. I would not hesitate to recommend him and the firm!
  
 
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   Mike Sakmann 
 107 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I sought legal advice regarding an employment matter and had an excellent experience working with Sam Smith, Esq. at KGG Law. Sam was thorough, attentive, and took the time to listen carefully to my concerns before providing clear, thoughtful guidance. I appreciated the professionalism and care shown throughout the process, and I would confidently recommend KGG Law to anyone in need of legal assistance.
  
 
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   Liz Hecker 
 113 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I can't say enough about this firm. They manage to comfort you during the whole legal process while staying professional and doing what is right. I would recommend them to anyone and also hire them again if I need legal help.
  
 
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   Brandy Miller 
 136 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Kate is the best. She helped me very quickly, and was very attentive with all of my needs. So thankful for her
  
 
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   Mike Greenspan 
 149 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Kate Carballo is a dedicated, passionate, and creative attorney whom I had the pleasure to lecture with at a state trial lawyer's conference. Kate's lecture demonstrated how she uses her innovative and "out-of-the-box thinking" to achieve outstanding results for her injured clients. That Kate is certified by the Supreme Court of New Jersey as a civil trial attorney is a testament to her skills, experience and commitment to excellence.
  
 
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   Jonathan Sampson 
 156 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Was referred to KGG law by a friend and could not have asked for better legal representation. They walked me through every step of the process after my accident and began every call with “ how are you feeling” which was just one example of how much they care about their clients. They handled my case very efficiently, professionally and courteously. My attorney Kate Carballo was a rock star! So clearly experienced, she consistently made me feel at ease with the process. Highly recommend
  
 
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   Vinnie Kung 
 159 days ago
 
 
 Trustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. We had a great experience with the team at KGG Law. While it was a traumatic time for our family, they made it very easy for us and explained all of our options. They even performed due diligence to make sure that after our settlement, there would be no further issues which I think is even more important than the settlement itself. Thank you!

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Does Your Child Not Want to Visit With Your Ex?

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